An Elephant Story…

I’m currently reading a great book that friend and fellow FATC guy, Sterling Short gave me. The book is Adam’s Return written by Richard Rohr. This isn’t a book review. I just wanted to share about something I read in the book and some thoughts it triggered — and I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Rohr says in his book, “We assume that animals imprint and pass on instinct more naturally than we do. But even our brothers in the animal world make it clear that juniors need elders to know who they are. Both humans and animals are imitative, or mimetic. We desire what others desire, and we do what we see others doing, even though it is humiliating for postmoderns to admit it. As Rogers and Hammerstein put it, we all ‘need to be taught, we need to be carefully taught.’ A few years ago there was a nature special on television about elephants in a certain part of Africa. For some reason, these young bull elephants were acting strangely out of character — antisocial and aimlessly violent; they were stomping on VWs, pushing over trees for no reason, and even killing other small animals and baby elephants. Park rangers came in to study the problem and, in the course of their investigation, they discovered that there were no older bull elephants in that area. By some accident, all the older bulls had either died or been poached for their ivory, which left the teenage males to roam and forage out of control. Their solution?

They brought in some older bulls from other areas by helicopter, lowered them onto the scene, and in matter of weeks, amazingly, the whole situation had changed. Apparently, all the old bulls did was wave their ears and make various sounds or small charges, and somehow the younger male elephants understood through these communications that their behavior was not the way good elephant boys should act. It seemed to be just that simple. Things soon returned to normal once the elders operated as elders. In the human realm, when there are no ‘kings,’ young warriors become brutal, magicians behave as charlatans, and lovers are soon addicts. Someone has to give the young male boundaries and identity. He does not get them by himself or without guidance.

We are not a healthy culture for boys or men. Not the only reason, but surely one reason is that we are no longer a culture of elders who know how to pass on wisdom, identity, and boundaries to the next generation. Most men are over-mothered and under-fathered — now even more in the age of single parents.

A short list of some of my thoughts:

I can either bullshit and complain about the situation or I can be the older, mature bull elephant.

I can stand up against the bullshit attitude that I have nothing to offer and it’s time for me to be put out to pasture. BTW, Moses was 80 years old when God put him to work.

I can stop making excuses and blaming others. Government and more laws aren’t going to help correct the problem. And I don’t have to change the country, but I can influence some of those around me. I may have to get creative on how I do this with my family. Most of them live out of town.

I can choose to be proactive and use what influence I have to be a leader and a mentor. In other words, I can choose to be a victim and let my family and friends be victims, or I can take action in my words and more importantly in how I lead my life. I can look at myself in the mirror and ask, “Am I leading a life worth imitating?”

I can be a warrior and stand up to political correctness and wokeism and stand firm against the “male toxicity” and “white privilege” labels that are being thrown around. If I say or do nothing, what else is the less mature person to believe?

I can intentionally use some of my time to mentor someone — including utilizing time on the water and time in the woods as an environment and an opportunity to communicate more than how to be a better fly fishermen. I can be a fisher of fish and a fisher of men at the same time.

I could easily add a longer list than is practical to share in the Forum, but I hope this at least gets each of us to think and take action about what’s happening all around us. Many of us have way more to offer than we might at first think we do. Stop listening to the voices inside and outside your head that tell you “you’ll never measure up”, “you don’t have what it takes”, “that’s somebody else’s job”, “nobody cares”.

Please don’t misunderstand where I’m coming from. Personally, I don’t think we need more critics. Words are important, but actions speak louder than words. I think we need more respected mentors, more leaders that lead by example, and more warriors who are willing to go against the current of our culture.

A closing thought: It’s been said, you will be the same person five years from now as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read. BTW, I met my friend Sterling and others through my involvement in our FATC fellowship (We aren’t a club.) and we have each grown through the books (including the Bible) we have read and our time together. Thanks again Sterling.